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Monday, July 18, 2011

Support Group for Neurotic Disney People Whose Spouses are Not- A Mini Drama

Recent article on the Disney Driven Life


My name is Ami and I am a Neurotic Disney Mom




The scene opens to a group seated in a circle.  The room is typical institution fashion with one exception.  It has been quickly decorated with posters, flags, drawings- all with a Disney theme and all put on the walls with tape.  Also placed around the room are various stuffed animal Mickeys, Donalds and Plutos, One large Stitch and three princess dolls.  There are refreshments on one wall of the room.  They include Mickey Krispie bars- plain and chocolate coated, Goofy’s Jelly Beans, butter popcorn and a drink fountain where you are expected to bring your own refillable mug.

The leader of the group, a woman named Joelle, calls the meeting to a start.
Joelle: The first order of business is, I would like to congratulate Tammy!  She convinced her husband to take a two-week Disney World vacation!  Way to go Tammy!
Tammy: You know the best part?  He said he wanted to go because it made me so happy!
{awwws all around}
Joelle: That’s so sweet! Something to strive for, isn’t it everybody?  At least we know there may be light at the end of that “thunder mountain tunnel!”  Does anyone else have good news to share with us?
Dave: I swayed my wife to let our son get his first haircut in Magic Kingdom!
(all around applause and congratulations)
Joelle: Wonderful! Take lots of pictures!  I can’t wait to see little David in the barber chair! Does anyone else have something to share?  It can be good news or even something you need support with.
Jaclyn: My husband told me I needed an intervention.  Is he kidding me?  He says I lead some kind of neurotic Disney lifestyle.  Sure I sing “Whistle While You Work” any time I’m doing chores, I dream, okay maybe slightly obsessively, of spending one perfect night in the castle and I can name all the countries in the 1.2 mile World Showcase in order…but…it could be a lot worse!  My neighbor…she’s addicted to Fan Boy and Chum Chum!
{various gasps are heard around the room}
Ted: That’s nothing!  My wife told me I needed to grow up and act like our teenage daughters’ age because I wear my Mickey golf shirt to business meetings! What happened to fun?
Jami: I say we hire some aliens to abduct all these spouses, wipe their brains  and exchange them with pixie dust!  I know of some little green guys down at the Pizza Planet who’d be on the case!
Jaclyn: I have a confession to make.  I “accidently” only washed my husband’s Disney themed underwear.  After the intervention comment it made me feel good knowing he was sporting a little Mickey!
{giggles}
Genny:  I listen to Selena Gomez sing Cruella De Vil –and I sing along quite loudly, too- even when my kids aren’t in the car.  I so very much love that song!
Jami: Well, while we’re on confessions: I cheat on my husband with Disney.  {she laughs a belly laugh}  I literally sneak out of bed in the middle of the night to look at reservations.  I have stayed up hours so I can call at exactly 180 days out to get Cindy’s Place.  After, I crawl back into bed and he never knew I was even gone!  Wait a minute!  I’m not confessing- I’m bragging!  {another belly laugh}
Ted: I once drew a hidden Mickey on my wife’s shoulder while she slept.
Jami: Okay Ted, that’s just weird.
{Ted blushes, but remembers the Mickey “tattoo” fondly}
Genny: My husband is a lost cause, I’m afraid.  Thank goodness we live in Orlando, and I can go whenever I feel like it!  He puts up with it, but I can tell he isn’t very fond of my Beauty and the Beast Giclée that hangs in the entrance of our home.  I see him giving it the hairy eyeball sometimes.  When we were first married I think he believed this was a phase.  {sigh} I need a Mickey Krispie.
{nods of agreement circle the room and hugs are offered}
Ted: Hey Joelle!  How about some music?
Joelle: Love to!  I just downloaded the soundtrack to Soarin’!

The lights fade as the group mingles with friends and they share photos of their last trips over sodas and snacks.  The music and lights gradually fade to black.

XO, Ami

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